Somethings about sex

You should have SEX on days that begin with T:
Thanksgiving,
Tuesday,
Thursday,
Today,
Tomorrow,
Thaturday?
Thunday?
Every Thucking day!

Sex is:
Like Nokia (connecting people)
Like Nike (Just do it)
Like Pepsi (ask for more)
Like Coca Cola (Enjoy)
Like me (too good to be true)

Top 10 Places to have sex:
In your bed
In your parents bed
In a car
On a washing machine, while running
In a hot tub
On a beach, down in the sand
On a comfy couch with the TV on
On a waterbed
A plane bathroom
In the rain

Top 10 Places NOT to have sex:
In the movies
In a car... WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING!
In front of all of your friends
In a phonebooth
In your best friend's bed
At Grandma's house
At school
In your dirty basement
In the street
ON-LINE

Top three things to say before having sex:
I love you (but only if you mean it)
Rock my world
Let's get ready to RUMBLE...

Top three things NOT to say before having sex:
Is this gonna hurt?
Sure....I've done this thousands of times...
Are you sure it's on there?

Top 3 things to say after sex:
Are you sure this was you're first time?
Gotta cigarette?
Wanna do it again?

Top 3 things NOT to say after sex:
That was IT??
I think I hear my mom calling me ---- see ya
OOPS, the condom broke! My bad